Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Sunday, June 26, 2011
2100sqft of loveliness is what I call my new home. Its seriously gorgeous. The only things that need to be done are reviving some of the law and kicking some cactus to thee curb. Aren't you jealous? Leaving them would be an accident waiting to happen between the dogs and kiddos. I hear you can send them in to shock and kill them by giving them too much water. Can you believe that? Made me giggle.
What else is new? Not too much. Can't wait for JPPSO to bring all of our stuff so we can start making the house a home and for Brian to sign in and get SRP over with so we can get our moving allowance. Guess what we get to spend our money on?! No no nothing exotic nor overly fun. Drum roll please....washer, dryer, and fridge since that's what our house is lacking. That is where my OCD came in handy. I refused to move until all the laundry was washed and dryed. Granted that wont help with our food cooling needs but that's where Rentacenter helps. Oh well at least after all this I will have them paid off and mine for ever and ever and everrr!!!
Oh oh oh!!! Brian made points! Can you say Sergeant Ingraldi??! Well that's all for now. I hope everyone back home is doing well. As soon as I have updates on the baby I'll post.
Friday, June 10, 2011
So yeah. I have become acutely aware of this of late. I don't know if its the stress of the 2 moves (to my mom's house and then to GA on the 17th) but seriously I feel so drained and disconnected. I feel like I really don't have anyone to talk to and all I really need is just to a cry-fest. Just let all the frustrations and stress out without judgement. I don't know what's changed between us. He would rather be on his phone playing stupid shit or searching for shit he doesn't need on Craigslist. I try to talk and all that results is shit getting blamed on hormones or that I am personally attacking him. I can sit right next to him and not even get acknowledged. It feels like the only time I get to feel like I'm something, like I am in part of a relationship is when we're around certain people. I don't know whats changed? It just makes me so mad. I have always been one of those people that you can't just say I love you too or buy things for me to feel loved, I need the physical attention. I know that makes me needier then others and in turn more difficult to be with. I try so hard to show everyone that mean anything to me that they are cared for and loved and wanted. Maybe I am setting my boys up for failure with that notion that the only they are loved is if someone shows them love in that particular way but its the only I know. As for the move, I realize that's what comes with when you are with a military man but damnit I would love to hear something other then that as a response when someone asks me how I feel about moving. I'm hoping that after all the stressers are resolved that things might go back to some sort of normalcy.
Promises of tomorrow don't always get you through tonight.
Friday, May 20, 2011
So here's whats new with us. We're starting the moving proses. Sigh, yes this again. Oh how I enjoy tearing down and shifting everything. My house my be a freaking mess but damn it, I know where everything is in my cluttered chaos. We have 10 days to pull this off. We need to get out of the apartment on the first. Oh here's the best part. The "Army" is moving all of our big things but since we had false information we get to move everything to my mom's home then they are going to come to her house to repack everything that I am already packing. Happy happy joy joy.
Side note. It warms my heart that we can be there for people, helping them out when they need it but as soon as we ask for help we get a sure man and not even a day later BLAM, uh sorry I have other shit going on. How precious are they.
I'm hoping that this time we stick to one home for more then a year. Wait. Do I? This means actually living in GA when I really don't even have any desire to visit there. trying to think of positives. Ummm ummm ummm ummm ummm. I hear there are a few really gorgeous places out in the country. Florida and the shore aren't too far away. Yeah that's all I got. Mmkay well I feel better. Until next time.
Oh oh oh. We got to see baby last Monday! Everything is going and growing as it should. Saw a little heart beats. It was really touching to see Bry get so excited over just a little spot on a computer screen. Never got to experience excitement from the male said of the equation.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Bwahahaha. So Landon just spent the last 10 minutes on the pot. While he was washing his hands we reminded him to flush the toilet. He ran over and did it and yell bye bye snake-y while laughing maniacly. This kid its too much sometimes.
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Hello my little rosebud. Its your mommy. I realize right now your too small to hear me so I'll talk to your soul that's floating around where ever souls do their little souly thing. I can't wait till I can feel you move around and kick. It almost hasn't even set in that I'm carrying you. My bubbies hurt, that's all that is different. I wonder what you will be like. Will you be outgoing like Landon or quiet like Kaden? (Those are your big brothers by the way.) We can't wait to meet you. If you're a little miss your name will be Helena Esabella or if you decide to grow a sprout its going to Xerek Asher. Will you look like daddy or me? What wil you go up to be? Will I be able to show all three of you how very much I love each of you?
I love you.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Monday, March 7, 2011
So there I walking around Petsmart lost in my own little curse the dogs world thinking to myself how the hell I was going to get the stains out from the carpet when I came upon a man in the check out line pushing a buggie with a new baby bundled up inside. It was clear the he was in the military, once you've been with a military man you can spot them like Manolo Blahnik in a sea of Payless or for you fashion challenged, a windows in a sea of macs, ew..anyways back to what I was saying. They have a certain "swagga" to them with a touch of cocky thrown in. Out of no where Landon says "What happen to his feets?" What happened to be going on with his 'feets' was that he was a double amputee. In addition to the obvious prosthesis because he was wearing shorts, they were wrapped ACU pattern. Those words of course caused me to immediately blush followed by a quick "I'm not sure baby." He walked away before I was able to say a word to him. I promptly checked out and walked my purchases to the trunk of my car and got the boys and myself in. What do you say to that innocent of a question. It wasn't hateful or judgmental, it was because he had never seen anything like that before but at the same time it was a rude comment. Now here comes the hard task. To tactfully explain to him that there is a time and place for those sort of questions and more importantly trying to explain to him that more then likely it was a horrible accident and furthermore that it might have happened during his duty. Maybe it is because Bry is due home in a day or two from Iraq or because I just finished with the parade of roses but it was too much for me to handle. I completely fell apart. The thought of that could easily happen to our family was just to much to handle. When we got home me and him sat out and I explained to him why his legs were like that and got on the internet to show him more pictures of prosthesis'. I told Landon that he lost his legs because he was strong enough to live without and that there is nothing that he should be scared about.
TO THIS MAN THAT HAS UNKNOWINGLY TOUCHED MY LIFE AND SEE HOW BLESS I TRULY AM, THANK YOU.
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Today is my Gotcha day. So what is that? Its something that I am pretty sure my mum invented. It has to be my favorite holiday. It was the day I was adopted. Well, more like the day she came to Mexico and retrieved me. Our celebrations consist of going out to eat/getting take out, a small gift, then usually cuppy cakes! To me, this day is coupled with a sense of superiority. I mean come on, its an exclusive holiday that us "children of the heart instead of the womb" get to party to. Nothing makes your feel more important then having an appreciation day. So basically kinda like a birthday but way more awesome! I remember growing up that I used to brag to my friends about February 6th. Of course they all pretty much thought I/this day was lame but I chopped up to jealously. Most children are surprises, I was carefully thought out and "invested in." Even now it has become a joke to laugh at the boys since they don't have a Gotcha day. (So ha haha ha ha boys YOU'RE MISSING OUT!) Perhaps someday I will be able to share a Gotcha day with one of my children? Only time will tell, but for now it is my special day. =]
Okay time for a random thought: I swear even my dogs can back talk in their own special doggy sort of way. I yelled "down" to them just a moment ago because the pampered pet that they are, like being on couches and beds. So what do they do? They lay down!
Well goodbye lovelies, off I shall go to enjoy my night.